in lieu of Va$htie

I was so dumbfounded when I heard females actually use
Vaseline and a toothbrush to tame their baby hair. Like really?
You actually spend time on those lil' threads? My baby hair
has become a damn grassland. It's got a mind of it's own I swear.
I used to wanna rip em' off but I've learned to 'embrace not erase'.
(I just mad that cornyness up.) So my baby hair has decided to
conquer my whole forehead, gaining territory currently on the top of my
eyebrows. So I figured let's try this Vaseline and toothbrush thing out. So
far it just greased up my head and I'll probaly have some acne from all
the innocent pores I just clogged. Just great...